WHY NOT HAPPY?
Assalamualaikum and Hello everyone.
So today, 21 September 2016 and October is approaching. While Aleya keep whispering " Kakak my birthday is coming" " I don't care since I didn't celebrated my birthday for 2 years okay " " I don't mind if you don't care since abah will " Gosh this girl. Everyday, i will wait for this girl to be home so I will have my punching bag. One day, like before going to sleep both of us will perform isyak then straight away to sleep. I'm not that kind of people that put my head on the pillow and straight away to dream-land. So hard if i'm not tired. But Aleya did. So my daily routine before sleep is, playing my phone while she don't have one hehe.
That night was different. She didn't sleep early. 11p.m. is still early for her! I don't understand because she starts class in the morning and need to wake up 5.30 a.m. ((nvm girl few years left)) she asked me " I'll miss you when you start going back to Melaka " yasssss am I dreaming?! " why you going to miss me? " I tried to control that weird feeling. " My daily routine while you not here is, going to school then i'll watch korean drama, eat, homework and sleep " she replied. " If i'm not mistaken, while i'm here you still doing the same thing ". She replied me, " i don't have someone to talk to. If in school, its fine. When I come back home? Urghh thats why I used to sit in the room doing my things and don't go out from the room unless the big boss calling "
So, i don't have answer from it. I just let her going to dreamland while me scrolling to old messages that my motivator send to me. Last time, I always refer to him if i'm not happy of having any problem. I don't know why he being so positive all day long. I never see him in depression. If he cannot do things like what coach want that day, he will make sure tomorrow it can be done. How? I have told him mylove story because I need to. That time was, a critical time of final phase in preparation for Sukma. Waking up from disappointment was the hardest thing I have do. He was never faced the thing I faced. But he advice, There is saying in Chinese that sounds like " if you able to carry it up, then you must be able to put it down "
I finally realized and forgive him. At that time many people come into my life to cheer me up. It takes months. But I do believe with the help of Allah SWT, it will ease. Yes. Allah make it ease. Now, i don't take serious when my friends talked about my past. The past make me stronger today and wiser. I choose to be happy especially now during my rest time. I really determined this time before I going back to continue my studies, I should start balance my mix emotions that might effect others soon. So is it relates with my younger sister problem? I told her, happiness is when you try to make yourself happy without think about others. Try to mix with your brothers lah! You so closed last time and you HATEME OKAY? Aleya is a lucky kid since she have a brothers who elder one year than her, younger 2 years and 4 years. While me, 5 years is the nearest. They live in 20's while me in 90's. At last, I can cope with their trend. Gadget life all the timeeeee. Like no time to go to playground, play the swings, slide. Your life is so boring.
Happiness is earned, baby.
So today, 21 September 2016 and October is approaching. While Aleya keep whispering " Kakak my birthday is coming" " I don't care since I didn't celebrated my birthday for 2 years okay " " I don't mind if you don't care since abah will " Gosh this girl. Everyday, i will wait for this girl to be home so I will have my punching bag. One day, like before going to sleep both of us will perform isyak then straight away to sleep. I'm not that kind of people that put my head on the pillow and straight away to dream-land. So hard if i'm not tired. But Aleya did. So my daily routine before sleep is, playing my phone while she don't have one hehe.
That night was different. She didn't sleep early. 11p.m. is still early for her! I don't understand because she starts class in the morning and need to wake up 5.30 a.m. ((nvm girl few years left)) she asked me " I'll miss you when you start going back to Melaka " yasssss am I dreaming?! " why you going to miss me? " I tried to control that weird feeling. " My daily routine while you not here is, going to school then i'll watch korean drama, eat, homework and sleep " she replied. " If i'm not mistaken, while i'm here you still doing the same thing ". She replied me, " i don't have someone to talk to. If in school, its fine. When I come back home? Urghh thats why I used to sit in the room doing my things and don't go out from the room unless the big boss calling "
So, i don't have answer from it. I just let her going to dreamland while me scrolling to old messages that my motivator send to me. Last time, I always refer to him if i'm not happy of having any problem. I don't know why he being so positive all day long. I never see him in depression. If he cannot do things like what coach want that day, he will make sure tomorrow it can be done. How? I have told him my
I finally realized and forgive him. At that time many people come into my life to cheer me up. It takes months. But I do believe with the help of Allah SWT, it will ease. Yes. Allah make it ease. Now, i don't take serious when my friends talked about my past. The past make me stronger today and wiser. I choose to be happy especially now during my rest time. I really determined this time before I going back to continue my studies, I should start balance my mix emotions that might effect others soon. So is it relates with my younger sister problem? I told her, happiness is when you try to make yourself happy without think about others. Try to mix with your brothers lah! You so closed last time and you HATE
Happiness is earned, baby.
